Dwight Howard Realizes the Truth

Saturday night, after the Boston Celtics have just defeated the Chicago Bulls

Dwight Howard: I have to fight with Perkins for 7 games? Crap. At least they have no shot at beating us this season. I mean, we have you, Jameer.

Jameer Nelson: Bro, I'm injured.

Dwight Howard: What? When did this happen?

Jameer Nelson: Like four months ago. I fell on my shoulder.

Dwight Howard: Dude, I thought you just got lost after we went camping at Gortat's llama ranch.

Jameer Nelson: No, that was Anthony Johnson.

Dwight Howard: Well, that's not a problem. We still have Kyle Lowry to man the point.

Jameer Nelson: No, Houston got Kyle Lowry. We traded a first-round pick for Rafer Alston.

Dwight Howard: NO. NO WE DID NOT.

Jameer Nelson: You've been playing with him for three months. What did you think was happening?

Dwight Howard: I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THIS. NOT RAFER. ANYTHING BUT RAFER.

Jameer Nelson: Too late, bro. Too late.


Rafer Alston: Yo D, yo whatup JaMz? Ima get ready to skip 2 mah loU up in Cindy Lou Who, nah mean? You broz in?

Dwight Howard: Kill me now.